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Does it need to be a competition?..


Housewife vs The Working Man

Stay at Home 'Person' (yes we do have lots of Dads at home these days) vs The Bread Winner..

Last week I was away in Melbourne and hubby had to work his way around his full time job and the to and fro of our kids at separate schools and the normal daily stuff like food, laundry, homework and the likes.

Did he manage? Yes of course he did!. Was he knackered when I returned on Friday? Beyond all comprehension he truly was.

What is the point of this post? Ever since I got back everyone (my fellow Mums) keep saying did you tell him 'welcome to my world?', did you say 'now you know how I feel'.

My answer? 'No, no need really' and it is not a no need as he knows now that he has done it but because he knew before I left. He is well aware that life juggling the kids is full on alongside running DTLL, He is well aware I fit in chores and laundry between meetings and he knows I am always working up until the last minute I fly out the door to get the kids.

He helps as much as he can outside his own work hours during the week and whilst he doesn't tell me all the time I know he knows it is not easy.

The thing I don't get is why it always seems that we have to have the age old them vs us on the who works harder front? Can't we all just respect that we work hard in out own ways and whether bringing in money or not to a family you are contributing by being present and setting and example for your kids?

Life is too short to be constantly trying to prove one up man-ship.. Be proud of what you do AND what your partner does in being a partnership not as individuals. I am. I am VERY much so.

Do you argue over who does what? Do you feel people make you justify your existence if you are 'just' a stay at home mum or dad?




8 comments

  1. I like the idea behind this post. I do feel that my partner doesn't understand how much I do in a day. Or he forgets day to day. But whenever I ask him if he'd like to switch roles, I am always met with an emphatic 'no', because he knows how exhausting it is!

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    1. I think in heart of hearts most men do but it just seems there is always this push from the female side to make them say it everyday!

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  2. Sounds like you guys have a really supportive relationship and really get each other. I have felt on occasion that my partner doesn't fully grasp how full on my life is with work and pick ups and drop offs from daycare, or long days at home with the kids. Perhaps he does and I just like to whinge :)

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    1. I don't think they can TRULY get it until they try it and even then we usually make sure the fridge is stocked , washing done, car filled with petrol etc etc but whether my partner truly gets it or not we just don;t need to power trip over it and surely that is more healthy for the relationship ?!

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  3. I think my husband "gets" it. He works hard. I work hard. My role is very different to what my husband does at work, but no less demanding. There are parts of my husband's work that I would hate (like standing up in front of 30 teenagers multiple times a day!). There are parts of my work that my husband would hate. I completely agree with you. It isn't about "outdoing" each other. We are working together in this! If I ever had to go back to full-time work for the sake of our family I would. If he ever had to do the "at-home" thing for the sake of our family he would.

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    1. so true Julie, my husband would love to be a house husband but only if it was purely that and no work involved on top :)

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  4. It seems to work okay at our place - it doesn't make any sense to me to be resentful of my husbie's admittedly less chaotic life. Either accept or change... it's a partnership, through and through and we pick up each other's slack. I try not to compare, but I think we both know that plenty falls on my lot that doesn't fall on his!! x

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    1. Same, Same here.. he gets it and appreciates it and that works for me :)

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