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Do you want to be a different person?

I am a totally different person.... to the one I was 15 years ago and even if I do say so myself I rather like this version better.

I couldn’t pin point exact change points as it’s all a journey and my road never seems to be forged in stone but what you do along the way shapes you future self. That person I was 15+ years ago had grown up in a world where no one shared (we had no social media and those surrounding me were not all that open). I worked a job, as a model, where people based their actions on physical attributes, rejection was standard practice and success was judged in material possessions and a commitment to narcissistic behaviour alongside unhealthy lifestyles.

Somewhere along the way (21 years ago actually) I met a man who held value in family over everything. I regained my passion for sports, became a mother and suddenly aware that my behaviour would impact who they became. I ran a business that was of service to others more than myself and ended up giving so much to everyone else that medication was the only thing to keep me from running myself into an early grave.

I always say the one thing medication is good for is the fact your first step forces you to admit there is an issue at hand and then the actual taking of it daily gives you the clarity to define your mistakes and see that a future is possible.

For a while I stayed the same path and just let the medication keep me balanced and that’s ok as I needed time to rest. Along my journey I met so many that were the same but suffering in silence, social media became a 'thing' AND my job had me public speaking more often. With that platform of both business and personal alongside the fact I was already helping others navigate the stresses of small business behind closed doors I just felt compelled to be open and honest about my journey. I knew it would be tough to be someone who showed weaknesses but I knew it was the right thing to do and would ultimately make me a better person also.

So these days I am me, I still kinda look like that perfect ‘model’ on the outside (thank you Mum and Dad for the pretty good genetics) but more importantly I like to think I have started to change the genetics on the inside and am looking more model like there too ..

I don’t read tabloid press because decent books or a podcast win over that..
I don’t watch reality TV because Netflix and Amazon Video are my only TV drug of choice..
I don’t even buy labelled clothes unless it’s sports gear and can justify its price tag in its purpose.

As a result my life is better, NOT perfect but so, so, so much better and I take pride in the kids I am shaping and the wife I am being. 

I look for the good in everyday however mundane the diary looks (yes that can be a HUGE effort) because I can make that day brighter. Simple things. Having an honest conversation, making someone smile with a compliment, baking my family healthy food and maybe even sharing that love with deliveries to my friends, even just minimising my own possessions and donating to a local charity but the biggest impact I appear to have is the honesty I express in my social media posts. Maybe it is because it is of service to others and that means the world to me (the old me would have looked for the Instalikes) but the new me buzzes from the personal messages behind the scenes. 

Vulnerability is a strength, we can’t move past issues until we shine a light on them and I guess that is the real truth behind my changes over the years. 

Share your truths, 
be honest with those you love,
acknowledge the power of continual growth from learning,
discover your powers and let them blossom,
create happiness in your days and look after yourself inside and out.

How have you changed over the years? What were your best lessons?

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